If you're reading this because you're now in a relationship, congratulations on making it to the relationship phase. Just like being in your masculine core got you to this phase, staying in your masculine core is going to keep you in the relationship.
If you've done the recommended reading in the dating area then you'll have a good foundation going into your relationship, but there is more to learn as the relationship phase brings a new set of challenges. I'm going to outline some of the things below, but to help you navigate the challenges of staying in your masculine core while you're in a relationship, I recommend that you read The Masculine in a Relationship by GS Youngblood. You can buy the book on Amazon by clicking this link - https://amzn.to/4b6tdT3
The masculinity tests will get bigger
One of the things that you will learn about being in a relationship, or that you've noticed from prior relationships, is that the tests get bigger. This is naturally going to happen because you've been her rock and foundation so far and she's going to feel that she can lean on you and bring bigger things to you. The problem for men is that when she brings it to you, it will often look chaotic. Sometimes this chaos will also seem to come out of nowhere and may have been triggered by you with you even knowing that you were going to trigger it.
For example, I recently had a test that came from my girlfriend where she was overwhelmed due to some changes in her life and since we're long distance, she saw me as one of the layers that was easier to remove from the situation to calm her anxiety that was being caused by the changes. It didn't help that I had played into her anxieties a bit without knowing her current state and pushing for what I wanted instead of realizing what she needed at that time; someone to usher her through her anxiety.
Fortunately, I was able to stay in my masculine core in front of her (I was a bit of a wreck behind the scenes) and get enough information out of her to understand what her current state was, what I had done to contribute to it, and how she felt we should move forward. By staying in my masculine core, I was able to set a plan for us that would alleviate her anxieties and give her some peace of mind. As a result, she started becoming her normal playful self within a few days as her anxiety dropped and she started healing from her cold that she had caught.
You'll need to learn how to be scarce and pull away
When men get into a relationship, they often feel they have won their lady over and they can start being ultra romantic and showering their lady with love. The problem with this is that woman start to feel suffocated and they lose their trust in the man. This is where it's important to have a purpose, hobbies, and friends that you can spend time with regularly so that your woman feels that you don't need her, but you choose her.
There are also going to be times in the relationship where you've spent a lot of time together, things seem to be going well, and then all of the sudden chaos erupts in your relationship. Like the example above, this is often a woman's way of telling you something that's going on with her, and if you've been highly available to her or you've spent a lot of time together recently, then it could be a sign that you need to pull away from her to give her space and find that attraction that she has for you. As the saying goes, "absence makes the heart grow fonder."
Don't let sex get boring
There are many more things you'll need to learn about staying masculine in a relationship, but I'm going to end this article on this one; don't let sex get boring.
If you spend enough time around women, especially women in their 30s, 40,s and above, you'll learn that men often get boring in the bedroom and they don't spice things up. You have to remember that women read and love romance novels like 50 Shades of Grey where the sex is exciting and passionate. If you're not trying to make sex exciting and passionate for your woman, then you're not being a masculine leader in the bedroom.
The Masculine in a Relationship by GS Youngblood has a chapter that covers this and there are plenty of YouTube videos an websites (including this one) that can teach you how to spice things up in your sex life.
If you've done the recommended reading in the dating area then you'll have a good foundation going into your relationship, but there is more to learn as the relationship phase brings a new set of challenges. I'm going to outline some of the things below, but to help you navigate the challenges of staying in your masculine core while you're in a relationship, I recommend that you read The Masculine in a Relationship by GS Youngblood. You can buy the book on Amazon by clicking this link - https://amzn.to/4b6tdT3
The masculinity tests will get bigger
One of the things that you will learn about being in a relationship, or that you've noticed from prior relationships, is that the tests get bigger. This is naturally going to happen because you've been her rock and foundation so far and she's going to feel that she can lean on you and bring bigger things to you. The problem for men is that when she brings it to you, it will often look chaotic. Sometimes this chaos will also seem to come out of nowhere and may have been triggered by you with you even knowing that you were going to trigger it.
For example, I recently had a test that came from my girlfriend where she was overwhelmed due to some changes in her life and since we're long distance, she saw me as one of the layers that was easier to remove from the situation to calm her anxiety that was being caused by the changes. It didn't help that I had played into her anxieties a bit without knowing her current state and pushing for what I wanted instead of realizing what she needed at that time; someone to usher her through her anxiety.
Fortunately, I was able to stay in my masculine core in front of her (I was a bit of a wreck behind the scenes) and get enough information out of her to understand what her current state was, what I had done to contribute to it, and how she felt we should move forward. By staying in my masculine core, I was able to set a plan for us that would alleviate her anxieties and give her some peace of mind. As a result, she started becoming her normal playful self within a few days as her anxiety dropped and she started healing from her cold that she had caught.
You'll need to learn how to be scarce and pull away
When men get into a relationship, they often feel they have won their lady over and they can start being ultra romantic and showering their lady with love. The problem with this is that woman start to feel suffocated and they lose their trust in the man. This is where it's important to have a purpose, hobbies, and friends that you can spend time with regularly so that your woman feels that you don't need her, but you choose her.
There are also going to be times in the relationship where you've spent a lot of time together, things seem to be going well, and then all of the sudden chaos erupts in your relationship. Like the example above, this is often a woman's way of telling you something that's going on with her, and if you've been highly available to her or you've spent a lot of time together recently, then it could be a sign that you need to pull away from her to give her space and find that attraction that she has for you. As the saying goes, "absence makes the heart grow fonder."
Don't let sex get boring
There are many more things you'll need to learn about staying masculine in a relationship, but I'm going to end this article on this one; don't let sex get boring.
If you spend enough time around women, especially women in their 30s, 40,s and above, you'll learn that men often get boring in the bedroom and they don't spice things up. You have to remember that women read and love romance novels like 50 Shades of Grey where the sex is exciting and passionate. If you're not trying to make sex exciting and passionate for your woman, then you're not being a masculine leader in the bedroom.
The Masculine in a Relationship by GS Youngblood has a chapter that covers this and there are plenty of YouTube videos an websites (including this one) that can teach you how to spice things up in your sex life.